Dear Bossip,
First and for most, let me start of by acknowledging the books you have wrote. I enjoyed them.
In addition to your books; I take pleasure in reading your response to articles on Bossip. The straight forwardness you have when convey your message. So, let me get to my question. I would like to know if I have come across an undercover brotha. I have known him for two years, and now we are both in the military. He has been deployed and so fourth. So, now that we’re stationed in the same area we have been seeing each other more. I refuse to commit to him because he is a ladies’ man and his past sends me red flags. So, why not have little fun here in there and on my terms.
However, he has always voiced to me that he wants to be more than just a friend, and he stopped talking to me for little while because I won’t commit. My point to him, show me you have moved on from your past then we can talk. He has yet to fully show me, but he did introduce to his baby mama brother. So, I don’t know if that was an effort, but it was not good enough for me.
Now, I have an even BIGGER issue. The other day when I was over his place, and I was bored and started snooping on his lap top. Well, I came across some “He/She” Pr0n, and Gay pr0n. Also, he had some Transgenders on there too. So, that got me to thinking. He does have all female friends with the exception of his brother, cousin and a couple of home boys. Initially, I contributed that to him being a ladies’ man. Then I got to thinking, what straight man would have gay porn and Transgenders on his PC? Also, he always wears colored rubber bands when he is regular clothes. All this is running through my mind.
So, the next day we meet have lunch and I asked him to walk and talk with me afterwards. I brought it to his attention what I found and asked if he considered himself bisexual or gay. His response baffled me. He said, “I’m gay,” and quickly retracted his statement. He said, “No, I’m not gay, honestly.” I then proceeded to ask him that if he wasn’t then why he is so calm and his reaction seemed more like he was ashamed and then mad. Like, wouldn’t a straight man be offended that I questioned his sexuality??? So, Terrance, am I reading too deep into what I found and the way he responded. I have not spoken to him since because I feel disgusted and that he didn’t take my feelings into consideration if that may be the case. Also, besides my finding are there signs if you are dealing with a undercover brotha? – For Future Reference
You can read my response, HERE: http://bossip.com/605350/dear-bossip-i-asked-my-man-if-he-was-gay-because-of-some-things-i-found-he-said-yes-but-retracted/
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