Dear Gay Best Friend,
I’m kind of hoping you can and will help me out. I’m a 23 year- old virgin and have been single for 8 years. I consider myself to be attractive and I have my life together while always trying to improve myself. Everyone always assumes I have boyfriend but alas, I don’t. I’ve gone on a few dates in those 8 years but nothing has ever come from them.
One date consisted of me and the guy going to a Chinese restaurant ending in him trying to guess my breast size and challenging me to an arm wrestling competition. Then he acted like he didn’t know why he was still single…yeah, I stopped seeing him post haste.
Then there’s a guy who’s a musician that comes around every blue moon who’s spontaneous and exciting but I can’t take him seriously. He says he’s attracted to me and wants to pursue things but he’s never in the same city because he’s constantly on tour. Also, if he does text me I’ll respond and he won’t say anything else. He’ll say something like, “Good morning beautiful,” and I’ll say, “Hey ________,” and I won’t hear anything else which frustrates the hell out of me. These instances are sporadic and months or even years apart. He’s a little odd.
Recently, I met a guy at work and we went out a couple of times but the last time we were on a date there weren’t any sparks at all and he never clearly defined his intentions. He wasn’t the least bit direct like I’m used to and left me completely confused. Also, I’m not sure if he remembers my name cause I’ve never heard him say it or seen him text it. I expect a guy to take the initiative and I think it just boiled down to there not being enough chemistry so I haven’t seen or communicated with him since that date. It’s disappointing because I don’t meet a lot of guys who I’m attracted to and who are single and interested in me at the same time.
I guess my question is, what am I doing wrong here, or is there something I need to do differently? I’m not the most social person, but I do go to different places just to keep from going to work then back home. I’m active in my church and even though I’m not much of a club person I’ll go once in a while just to have a change of scenery or just to have fun. The usual demographic for guys that hit on me are men who are 20+ years older than me, or guys my age who ain’t about -ish. I’d rather have someone no more than 3-4 years older than me. Maybe I’m not direct enough because I’m a little shy, but I feel like a man should pursue a woman. Besides, the last time I pursued a man it ended up in the Chinese restaurant incident. I’m not in any rush to lose my virginity by the way. I just want to meet someone that challenges me and who I can really vibe with. Where is he?? (Age old question) Any suggestion would be helpful. – Over Being Single
You can read my response, HERE:
http://hellobeautiful.com/sex-love/terrancedean/im-a-virgin-who-wants-to-meet-someone-challenging-intriguing-where-is-he/
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