If You're At NABJ This Weekend, Check Out The Panel I Am On...

NABJ (National Association of Black Journalists)

Friday, July 30th

9:00 a.m. - 10:30 a.m.

Being A Black Author

Moderator: Gil Robertson, Author, "Family Affair" and "Not In My Family"

What does it really take to break through to a broad reading audience, as a black author? What are the challenges to getting reviewed and noticed by the masses and finding crossover appeal. How does a writer stay true to his or her culture and voice and still break through to publishing success? Top authors will talk about how they make a way as successful Black authors and how you can too.

Panelists:

Farai Chideya, Author, "Kiss the Sky"

Terrance Dean, Author, "Visible Lives"

Helena Andrews, "Bitch is the New Black"

Rochelle Riley, "Raising A Parent"


Where:
Manchester Grand Hyatt San Diego
1 Market Place
San Diego, CA 92101

http://www.goeshow.com/nabj/Annual/2010/authorsshowcase.cfm

Today Is, "He Can Get It" Wednesday: Jarvis....

Hump Day, Hump Day! And, you know what that means? Yes, it’s “He Can Get It” Wednesday.


This week’s, ‘get-me-through-the-rest-of-the-work-week-visual-eye-candy,’ is Mr. Jarvis Powers. This twenty-five year old sexy stud was born in Columbia, SC, but raised in the Washington D.C area, or what folks like to call it, “The DMV” (DC, Maryland, Virginia). Jarvis currently resides in Pittsburgh, PA where he is completing the last semester of his Masters of Science Degree at Robert Morris University.

Jarvis declares that he is a proud member of Phi Beta Sigma Fraternity Inc., and he is a Division-1 FCS All-American Football Player, and the 2010 WPAL Golden Glove Boxing Champion. Yes, ladies, he is good with his hands!

Jarvis got into modeling because so many people throughout his life suggested he take it up. “But I never listened,” Jarvis said. “I just felt like the more I turned it down, the more opportunities kept knocking. As I became older, I realized how much modeling could be a stepping stone to accomplishing more in my life. The networking I’ve gained through modeling, as well as my other experiences, have helped me encourage others to strive for their goals and dreams.”

You can read about and see more of Jarvis, HERE:
http://hellobeautiful.com/sex-love/he-can-get-it/terrancedean/he-can-get-it-wednesday-jarvis/

The One Year Anniversary of the Passing of E. Lynn Harris...

Commentary: Remembering E. Lynn Harris
Essence.com
Friday, July 23, 2010
3:00 PM
by Terrance Dean

I still can't believe it. It's been a year since the passing of my friend, mentor, and literary giant E. Lynn Harris. The man behind the movement, yes, a movement in Black literature. And, not just literature, but a movement in the Black community. Because of E. Lynn Harris, the world was made privy to the lives and relationships of down low and gay men of color, oftentimes complex, through his two main characters Raymond and Basil. Their lives played out like a soap opera. And, with each book E. Lynn put out, Black women, and Black men, lined up at bookstores to get their next fix of the love triangle E. Lynn lovingly and daringly wrote about.

He eloquently wrote stories that helped Black women understand the challenges, heartbreak, and diverse lives of Black gay men, as well as, he helped so many Black men who were hiding, or afraid to come to terms with their sexuality. E. Lynn became a voice, valiant and strong, transforming the lives of Black people all over.

I first met E. Lynn a little over five years ago. I was hosting an event in Harlem for the organization Real Men Cook. We were looking for a celebrity to participate and make an appearance at our event at the Harlem YMCA. I immediately contacted E. Lynn and he graciously accepted the offer. I was unprepared for E. Lynn's fan base. Women from all over New York stood in line, which snaked out the door and into the streets, to meet E. Lynn and get their books signed. They wanted to meet him, shake his hand, and take pictures with him. Without hesitation he sat for four hours and met every woman who came through the door. That is how humbled, gracious, and accommodating he was.

Read more: http://www.essence.com/entertainment/commentary_4/commentary_remembering_e_lynn_harris.php##ixzz0uXKIDgqi

Today Is, "He Can Get It" Wednesday: Marquise...

This week’s featured model is the chocolate sexy morsel, twenty-two year old, Marquise. He was born in Geneva, New York, and currently resides in Marysville, Washington.


Marquise started modeling about 3 years ago. He said that he decided to put up some pictures on the popular modeling website, Model Mayhem that he had taken of himself in his bathroom. “I hoped photographers would like what they saw, and want to shoot me.” Well, within six months, Marquise was signed with an agency based out of Oregon called Sports Unlimited. And you may have seen him in a Nike commercial: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wcEaS7n7VVo

Beyond modeling, Marquise plays semi-pro football. He works out three to four times a week, and plans to enroll in college in the fall where he will play football also.

I asked Marquise what he looks for in a woman and he said, “I look for a woman to be smart. Someone who loves to go out and try new things. I like a woman that can dance, and just overall like to have fun, but also she wouldn’t mind just kicking back at the house and watching TV.”

You can see and read more about Marquise, here:
http://hellobeautiful.com/sex-love/he-can-get-it/terrancedean/he-can-get-it-wednesday-marquise/

Today Is, "Straight From Your Gay Best Friend" Advice Day...

Dear Gay Best Friend,


I just learned about you and I think what you are doing is wonderful. I love the advice you give, and I know it is true and honest.

Here it is, I have been with my man, “Isaac,” for eight years and I am ready to leave. First of all, this relationship was doomed at the beginning. Everything I said I did not want in a man is what I ended up with.

Some of the things are: I said I did not want a man who was walking and did not have a car, no one who has been in jail, no one with a lot of kids, and no one that hits a woman. Isaac has done everything on my list. You see I prayed for strength, wisdom, and guidance and I thought God sent Isaac to me. That is why I stayed in the relationship. As the years went by I saw he was mean, demanding, manipulative, controlling, and just downright rude!

Isaac is an Aries and I am a Libra. I like to stay balanced, but he is tipping my scales and I can’t keep them straight. What has happened is that I just realized I am being verbally abused. I have always told him there is a way to say things to people so that they don’t get the wrong impression. Whatever he thinks just flies out of his mouth. For instance, Isaac does not want to go on a cruise because he said stuff happens. I told him I was going on a cruise this year and he said if I do he will not be here when I get back. At this point I don’t care. He also told me that he has to distance himself from me because I make him mad, or that he feels like knocking me out. These are fighting words to me.

I have lost some of the love in my heart for Isaac because of the things he says and does. He has made me feel like I am not important anymore to him. I have to get the groceries out the car while he sits there and play video games. Don’t get me wrong, Isaac is a hustler and he will offer to help when he sees me going back and forth with the bags. There are other small things he does that I feel he should be treating me more like a woman. We do not have trust in our relationship.

These are some of the small things in our relationship that have been eating away at my soul, but I have no one to talk to about this. We do not go out (clubbing or otherwise) without each other, but I feel only because he wants to know what I am doing with my time. Isaac feels like I should ask him out or pay for whatever we do. He will pay once in awhile, but I am used to the man paying for everything, and if I want to pitch in I can. I already know I have to do something about him (leave!).

I just want another opinion on this doomed relationship. I am not happy at all now, and I once thought I was. Isaac was in prison before and a lot of his ways remind me of what they would do while in prison. I know he is selfish, and I am giving. We are opposites and I must say there may be certain things about me that he hates. I try to treat people the way I want to be treated, but I don’t feel he wants me to treat him the way he treats me. He said he was used to the woman paying for him and his way. Now, come on, I am the Bitch not him…LOL

I am mad at myself because I overlooked all of the warning signs. Neither of us has ever cheated on the other, but I am at the point where I want to find someone to treat me like a lady and we share how a relationship is supposed to be.

By the way, we live together. He has asked me to marry him, but I know we will never get married. I was married before and I learned from my mistake. What happens before you get married will continue to happen while you are married!!! I am no fool. I will not marry him and I know by now he will not marry me. I just want to disappear out of his life with no explanation because I know he can’t handle the truth. What should I do? – Want To Escape

You can read my response, HERE:
http://hellobeautiful.com/sex-love/terrancedean/im-over-my-relationship-and-i-want-to-escape/

Open Male Model Casting Call...

Calling all male models! Open model casting call!


We’re on the hunt for the next fresh faces in male modeling to grace the pages of an 18-month calendar. The calendar is going to accompany the national release of an upcoming book published by a major publishing house in 2011.

Do you think you have what it takes to be a featured model in a national 18-month calendar? If this is you, then we want to see you.

When: Sunday, July 18th

Where: 208 W. 29th Street, Room 613, New York, NY

Time: 3pm - 6pm

Please confirm an appointment by sending an email to: hidinginhiphop@aol.com

All models must bring a comp card with various photo shots, and sizes, as well as be prepared to take a photo.

Two Booksignings - The Harlem Book Fair (Sat. 7/17); HueMan Books (Wed. 7/21)

HARLEM BOOK FAIR 2010


EVENTS @ TMA (Thurgood Marshall Academy) 200 West 135th Street

TMA AUDITORIUM - Saturday, July 17th

The Life and Works of Literary Icon E. Lynn Harris: Breaking Barriers and His Profound Impact on the Black Community

12:00p - 1:15p

New York Times best-selling author, E. Lynn Harris, captivated the world with his amazing storylines of black gay and down low relationships. His stories wove intricate plots of black men looking and finding love in a taboo world. E. Lynn was a literary icon and trailblazer who was able to bring national attention to the black LGBT community. Women, and men, could not get enough of his novels. His fan base surpassed hundreds of thousands landing him on The New York Times best-sellers list, time after time, helping to bring recognition to black gay love stories.

Unfortunately the world lost literary icon, E. Lynn Harris, on July 24, 2009. He suffered a heart attack while in Los Angeles at the young age of 54. This panel discussion features authors Terrance Dean, Stanley Bennett Clay, and James Earl Hardy, along with E. Lynn’s former editor, Janet Hill, as they discuss the impact and works of E. Lynn Harris. They provide an intro- and retrospective look into a man who took the literary world by storm and became a one-man dynasty.

The authors will also read excerpts from their recently released best-selling tribute anthology to the late author, "Visible Lives: Three Stories in Tribute to E. Lynn Harris".

PRESENTERS: Clarence Haynes, Former Editor for E. Lynn Harris; Terrance Dean, Stanley Bennett Clay, and James Earl Hardy

Book signing immediately following discussion in TMA Auditorium Lobby.

______________________________________________________________________

Saturday, July 17th

Deconstructing Fatherhood: More Than Just Being There

TMA (Thurgood Marshall Academy) – Classroom 312

2:00p - 3:15p

What is Fatherhood? Is it a role, a frame of reference, a behavior, or just a set of socially sanctioned activities? We often hear about the value of fatherhood. Is it more than just being present in the home? How essential are father’s as opposed to having a healthy home environment and caregivers? At one time fathering meant being a good provider, not a nurturer or a homemaker. Today the role of a father has greatly expanded? Has it evolved to reflect who we are as a human being as opposed to a narrowly defined behavior? Is fatherhood something innate to men or a process to be understood, and developed based upon our own personal histories?

MODERATOR: Marc Collins, Founder; The FLOW

PANELISTS: Cassandra Mack, The Black Man's Little Book of Encouragement; Robert T. Gardner, The Choices We Make; Dr. Carlton Payne, Triumph Over Tragedy; Terrance Dean, Hiding in Hip Hop

Book signing immediately following discussion in Hue-Man Central Outdoor Bookstore Café on West 135th Street.

_________________________________________________________________

Book-signing - "Visible Lives"
Terrance Dean, Stanley Bennett Clay, James Earl Hardy

Wednesday, July 21st
6pm - 8pm
Hue-Man Bookstore & Cafe

2319 Frederick Douglass Blvd

(Between 124th and 125th Streets)

New York, NY

Check Out Another Dose of, "Straight From Your Gay Best Friend"....

First letter:

Dear Gay Best Friend,

My boyfriend keeps checking up on his ex-wife’s e-mail as well as doing little web searches on her. Should I question him or leave it alone? What should I do? We have been together a year and some months. He is a nice man and is good to me and my kids. I just don’t know what to do. – Not Sure


Second letter:

Dear Gay Best Friend,

I have a man and we’ve been together for a few months. He’s a sweet guy. When we go out he says, “Wow, you look nice.” You know, things like that. And, the sex is amazing. He handles his business from top to bottom every time.

He coaches little league and plays softball every Sunday. He wants me there so I go and support my man. We do lots of things together movies, dinner, and basketball games. We recently went to The Essence Music Festival.

The problem is I’ve never been to his house. I don’t know where he lives. He leaves my house every night between 1am and 3am. He says he has to be at work at 5am and his job is very important to him.

I like to spoil everybody around me, including my man. So, I do a lot of thoughtful things like buying him expensive cologne and cards, simply because. He knows I love flowers and he has been saying he’s going to send me some. However, for weeks, I still have not gotten any flowers. Gay Best Friend what’s the deal on this guy? – In The Dark

You can read my response, HERE:
http://hellobeautiful.com/sex-love/terrancedean/hes-my-man-but-his-behavior-says-otherwise/

Today Is, "Straight, From Your Gay Best Friend" Advice Day...

Dear Gay Best Friend,


First, let me say that I love the advice you give to us women who sometimes need help on how to understand and relate to men.

I come to you with a problem of my own. I am twenty years old (soon to be twenty-one), a senior in college, and a VIRGIN! I will admit it bothers me at times that out of my group of friends, I’m the only one not getting any, but I usually just laugh at the jokes and explain my reasons why I’m waiting. And, I’m tired of meeting guys who say they respect my decision, but continue to try and pressure me. But this is my question: Is having sex really that important in a relationship? I mean, everyone continues to tell me how I should have lost it by now, and questioning me about what I’m waiting for. But, I’m also continually told that sex is not that big of a factor when it comes to a relationship.

There’s more to this story. I’ve been talking to this guy, “A.V.,” who’s in the military, currently stationed in Afghanistan and has been “sexually frustrated” for almost a year now. We talk on a daily basis, and I told him that I’m sexually inactive and he explained that that’s one of the first things he’s looking forward to when he comes back home. I really like this guy, and I don’t want to jeopardize our current or future relationship because I can’t meet his needs. Can you please help provide some insight about this major topic, because I honestly can’t meet a guy who is interested in all of me, not just what they “think” I can do for them. — Sexually Confused

You can read my response, HERE:
http://hellobeautiful.com/sex-love/terrancedean/im-a-virgin-is-sex-really-important-in-relationships/

Today Is, "He Said, She Said" Book Review: Platinum...

Today is the book review, ”He Said, “She Said” with Nakea Murray and Terrance Dean. And, this week’s featured book is Platinum: A Novel by Aliya King (Touchstone – July 2010; $24.99).


Platinum is a sexy and salacious novel that takes the reader inside the world of celebrities and Hip Hop. You only think you want this life . . .

Alex Maxwell is busy. She’s planning her wedding to up-and coming music artist Birdie, ghostwriting video vixen Cleopatra Wright’s memoir, and she’s just been assigned the story of the year by her editor in chief at a major music industry magazine—an article about the glamorous lives of women married to platinum-selling hip-hop artists. Alex has been interviewing celebrities and hangers-on long enough to know all that glitters isn’t gold, so she’s determined to get the real scoop. Still, it’s not going to be easy to get past the wives’ gilded cages.

Beth Saddlebrook is the wife of aging rapper Z. They have three beautiful boys and a seemingly endless supply of cash. But Beth spends her days trying to keep Z off drugs and fielding calls from women who taunt that she’s just a “small-town white b****” and claim to be carrying Z’s baby. Only one person understands what she’s going through. And that’s Kipenzi.

Kipenzi Hill is a multi-platinum-selling R&B artist and Beth’s best friend. Her relationship with rap star and record label president Jake is an open secret in the industry. She knows Jake loves her, but he’d rather break up than publicly acknowledge it. Now she has learned that the newest (and much younger) R&B sensation Bunny has been signed to Jake’s label.

Josephine Bennett is the wife to Jamaican singer and uberproducer Ras Bennett. Josephine doesn’t just want to spend her husband’s money, she wants to contribute. Her fashion company is finally starting to get media attention when her husband admits to something she’s suspected all along—he’s fallen in love with another woman.

Cleopatra Wright is every man’s dream girl, a video vixen with a story to tell and scores to settle. Cleo’s got that thing no one can put a finger on and no man (or woman) can resist. Some would call her evil or misguided or both, but Cleo always moves with a purpose and she’ll stop at nothing to get what she wants.

Alex realizes she may have more in common with these women than she’d like. What if this is a glimpse of how her life will be if Birdie finally gets signed to a major label? Stuck between her loyalty to this newfound sisterhood and her obligation to write the truth, Alex is forced to rethink everything she knows about work, friendship, and love.

You can read more, here:
http://hellobeautiful.com/special-features/read-a-book/terrancedean/he-said-she-said-book-review-platinum-by-aliya-king/

Today Is, "He Can Get It" Wednesday: Brandon...

Yes, lawd! Uhm, uhm, uhm, is all I can say. This week’s “He Can Get It” featured model is twenty-five year old, Brandon. Fine, sexy, and gorgeous.


Okay, I know it’s hot outside, but Brandon is bringing the heat!!

Born in Philadelphia, PA, he was raised in Newark, Delaware. Brandon jumpstarted his modeling career when he took initiative and sent his pictures to a modeling agency in New York. He heard some positive feedback and stayed focus ever since. Don’t you just love perseverance? It definitely paid off for Brandon. He is part of the elite and exclusive modeling agency, Legacy Model Management. You can contact, CEO, Jai Gutierrez @ jai@legacymodelmanagement.com

I asked Brandon what he looks for in a woman and he said, “I look for the whole package. Not just how she looks on the outside, but what’s in the inside, her heart and brain. I like her to be respectful, loyal, driven, and definitely down to earth.” I know there are lots of Hello Beautiful ladies who fit this description.

You can see more of Brandon, HERE!:
http://hellobeautiful.com/sex-love/he-can-get-it/terrancedean/he-can-get-it-wednesday-brandon-2/

Today Is, "Straight, From Your Gay Best Friend" Advice Day...

Hello good people! I hope everyone had a great holiday weekend and it was filled with a glorious celebration!


This week’s letter is from a woman who is currently a soldier serving our country in Afghanistan, but she wants to know if the fellow soldier she fell for is really in love with her. Check out the letter, and remember, as you enjoy time with family and friends this July 4th weekend, keep our soldiers and those fighting in this war in your hearts and prayers.

Enjoy!

Dear Gay Best Friend,

I am currently in Afghanistan and my first three months were the best. Why? All because of this guy I met, “Smith.”

I was just beginning my deployment and Smith was on his way out at any day. During the three months, we developed a friendship. I was talking to other people, but I slowly saw myself starting to stray away from them and be with Smith more. He was different than any other guy. He didn’t complain about everything I did, he didn’t criticize me, and he understood me. Around his friends he talked so highly of me. I know Smith cared for me.

Well, next thing I know, we had a full blown relationship and the love word worked its way in. If you saw one of us then you saw the other. There was no separating us. We asked each other plenty of times what are we doing and where is this going because he was leaving soon. I didn’t look for anything past Afghanistan. I knew Smith would go back to his life in the states, and, oh yeah, by the way, he was going back to a pregnant ex-girlfriend. I knew he would forget all about me. He assured me plenty of times that wouldn’t happen.

Smith wanted nothing more but to be with me, even if I did have eight months left. We made plans when I came home on R&R, and plans for when I was finished with my deployment. Even his friends would make group plans when I came to visit. On a Friday, at dinner, Smith got the word they were moving out the next day. I could tell he was upset with the short notice and wasn’t prepared to leave me. We spent the night together and said goodbye to each other the next morning. Later that day, I was walking to my room and all I could think about was Smith, and the tears started flowing. As I was walking my phone went off letting me know I had a text message. I prayed it was from him and it was. The message read, “I don’t think it will work. I think we should call it off.” My heart dropped. As I stood there already crying, because I missed him, the tears flowed even more because he had just broke my heart.

We talked again before he left the country and Smith said he loved me, but just couldn’t deal with the distance especially since he had been gone for so long. We agreed on just being friends and taking it one day at a time. So, the goodbye came again, and he left the country. I hadn’t talked to him in a few days so he sent me a message saying that he was about to fly out. He said he enjoyed our time and that he cared a lot about me, and to make sure I keep in contact with him. Two days after that I emailed Smith saying I will call once I got in the states and he replied, “Yeah, call me, that’s good…don’t contact me anymore.” Yet, again, there I was speechless and confused. How can three weeks ago we go from, “I love you so much, and I don’t want to ever leave you. I will wait,” to, “We can be friends. You have so long left in Afghanistan,” to, “Don’t contact me anymore.” I emailed back saying, “Hey, you just contradicted yourself. What are you talking about?” Smith emailed back, “Don’t contact me anymore.”

I saw an article that was posted here on Hello Beautiful called, “6 Ways To Tell That He Has Fallen In Love With You.” I decided to read it and see if Smith was in love with me. Well, all six of those were him all the way, and, still two days after he leaves, I get an email breaking my heart. I know Smith loves me. What he and I had wasn’t just a fling. Everything he said to me he meant. But, why did he tell me not to contact him anymore? Maybe the love is too strong and he feels he couldn’t handle it.

I can’t stop thinking about and crying over Smith. I have to excuse myself from work sometimes because I can’t stop the crying. I find myself not wanting to get out of bed. I don’t want to eat. I just want to be in my room and cry. Even after he is gone people come up to me saying, “Hey, that guy really liked you. I could tell when I saw you all together.” That breaks my heart. I love him a lot, but I know there is no going back with us. We are done. How can I accept and move on from this? — In Love and War

You can read my response, here:
http://hellobeautiful.com/sex-love/terrancedean/im-a-soldier-at-war-but-i-lost-my-heart-in-love/

Today Is, "He Said, She Said" Book Review: In My Father's House...

This week’s “He Said, She Said,” book review takes a look at E. Lynn Harris’ latest novel, In My Father’s House (St. Martin’s Press – June 2010; $24.99). E. Lynn transformed the literary world with his compelling story lines, plots, and characters which often featured down low, and gay men from upper-middle class. They were sports players, businessmen, and celebrities. He knew how to tell a story that kept you wanting more. E. Lynn’s books helped to create a much needed dialogue in the black community about black down low and gay men. He spoke of intimate relationships, love, and friendships in his books. Things he truly found dear and near to him. E. Lynn was a trailblazer in publishing and he paved the way for so many other authors to come through. One of them was me, and I am so grateful and forever thankful for his perserverance, dedication, and commitment to being true and an honorable man.

Before he died last year, E. Lynn wrote, In My Father’s House, this bang-up first installment to a projected series about a bisexual owner of a Miami modeling agency. Bentley L. Dean III, runs the Picture Perfect modeling agency in South Beach. His father, a homophobic Detroit millionaire, disowned him after he broke off an engagement and had an affair with a male TV sports reporter, and though the agency’s been a success, the recession has taken a big bite out of Bentley’s business. Strapped for cash, he reluctantly agrees to supply gay, bi or very open-minded eye candy for a VIP party hosted by Prosperity Gentleman’s Club, which is run by Emperor Seth Sinclair, a closeted gay celebrity. When Jah, an 18-year-old student Bentley’s been mentoring, covers for a no-show model and begins an affair with Seth, big trouble looms. Harris’s wry tale about second chances highlights what readers have long loved about his work: his ability to depict the pursuit of love and self-respect, regardless of societal and family pressures.

Check out the rest of the article here:
http://hellobeautiful.com/special-features/read-a-book/terrancedean/he-said-she-said-book-review-in-my-fathers-house/